EDIT: LIFE…

EDIT:  LIFE. ERROR.

Due to a recent editing error in Friday’s Review stating the gallery was slated for an April opening,  the article should have instead read:  April closing. Lively yet wrong speculation over this now closing event begat rumour-mill drivel.  I apologise for any circumstance in or beyond my control this may have caused. Even though I tried to make this closing  event not about me, it became as such. To the point: My Reader would like me to… move on.

Abbreviated version:  my job is moving to another location. Actually, another state.

Additional  abbreviated version: My job is moving. I am not.

I have been pathetically confused and lost. Honestly?  Mostly pathetic.

I find myself sitting at the breakfast table well into the noon hour still wearing pajamas instead of my sleek and snappy three-inch Franco Sartos tucked neatly underneath my computer desk in my stylish art gallery.  It has been several slogging month-long,  pajama wearing afternoons coming to terms with (dare I say it?)…retirement, she whispered through pursed lips.

Three years ago, at the younger age of sixty-two, I drew the blinds and locked my dressmaking studio doors for the last time. My small dressmaking business became [yet] another victim of an unforgiving and devastated US economy. My handmade products were caught in the shipping lanes between here and all foreign out-of-country ports selling garments/wearing apparel for women and children.

Not one to wallow in a broken-hearted stupor for longer than necessary, and finding that swearing was actually cheap and beneficial to no one except myself…My Reader once again encouraged and harangued  me to…move on.  Very quickly I found another job as a research assistant to owners of  an art gallery within walking distance of my flat.

My job: research signature authenticity, provide provenance, explore unknown artists for historical information, and correspond with major museums and historical societies throughout the United States. I answered the phone. And, yes…got the coffee. My master’s degree is in art education. I’m an artist. This was a perfect job. Yes, it was I confess, all about me and my life-long passion for all things about, to and for…ART.

This was such a perfect job…I worked for free. Yes, River City residents, again I confess, I volunteered. My bosses were absolutely the toot’s potatoes and going to work was a joy. The job had purpose. So did I. It was educational. I was swept up in an artistic vortex. My mingling amongst those who extrapolate their view and then transpose it into something new and different was not unlike an emotional experience of falling…up. It was THE perfect fit.

Consider me…fortunate.

 

EDIT: LIFE. OPPORTUNITY

 Watercolour R Self Portrait

What this means, I say, is a younger-old life staring at me square in the face.

 And again this is what I see: opportunity.

 Again a confession: It took a wee-while to get to this place.

I can now look in the mirror and see my view not only for what it is but, and better still,  for what I can make of it.

Yes, consider me…fortunate.

 Very.

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47 thoughts on “EDIT: LIFE…

  1. ciao!
    We just have to live each new day as if it’s a precious gift. When I wake up in the morning I like to think that this day will be better than any day I’ve ever lived. ~ J.E.B. Spredemann
    you inspire…thanks.
    thebestdressup

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    1. Ahhh. the toot’s potatoes…..
      Think “the cat’s pajamas”….
      but with a twist!

      Thank you for stopping by. Your visit to Thailand was a holiday? Beautiful photos….in any event….even of the swimming lizard…..

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    1. I’m no longer able to access your website…my security system Bitefinder is telling my computer you are a phishing site. Carrie Rubin’s site was also blocked (go figure that one!) until she waved a magic wand and had it fixed. Would you look into it? I’d hate to miss anything you post…….Raye

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      1. Raye,
        YES! I am done with this rain! It’s a dangerous time to be looking for a new place to live. Instead of looking at houses, I look at weather…
        John

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        1. Be patient…on both accounts. I know (too well) how very stressful this selling/buying thing is. It is a crap shoot at best. Control what you can…the other stuff will happen when it happens. Strong Portland energy headed north to Seattle….feel it?

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  2. R., often we need to take some time to day dream as this can lead us to think about the permutations of the paths or path we may want to go down in life.Your positive approach is a strength to us all and I can only have good feelings for you about what the next chapter in life can hold. This has been a soul searching blog and so inspiring. I just know there are wonderful things on the horizon to come for you because of your determination and optimism! Regards, J.

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    1. Whenever I think that I’ve reached the bottom of the barrel or I have no more tricks to play (no, no not those kind of “tricks”)…my creative bent inclinations take over. So far…so good. I think you may relate to…listening to the quiet?

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    1. Thank you Mr. A…this band of gypsies (you know them, too) that gather round and lend supporting hands and friendships is all part of IT….IT being what we do to keep falling…up.

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  3. This entry was beautiful and moving, as is the wonderful painting shown at the end. It sounds like your soul-searching was painful and hard, but it also sounds like you’ve come out on the other end of it with a lot of hope and good feelings for what the future holds. This is so inspiring. I wish you much luck on your journey forward. I just know there will be wonderful things to come for you!

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    1. Oh my….such kindness coming from such far away places. This should be a lesson to us all that we never know who plays a part in our happiness and well being…even strangers we’ve never met except on a page with written words. Thank you for your words on my page.

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  4. Sometimes what we need most is time in our jammies doing nothing. It gets the daydreaming started which is where I think all journeys begin. I am looking forward to reading the next chapter.

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    1. First things first: a new pair of really nice PJs…maybe some scruffy slippers, too!! Need to look smart and be smartly dressed as I suss out the next part of this journey….

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  5. I’m looking forward to what’s next, but retirement is not in my plans. Be that as it may, finding my direction and purpose changes with every year under my belt. Like everyone else here at your blog and comment stream, I eagerly await news on the next act. Just leave a date open in August for coffee.

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    1. Did I actually say the “R” word? You didn’t see my fingers….they were behind my back and crossed! My plan is to die trying to retire…
      Now about August….don’t get me excited about coffee in Portland with you and the Mrs. this early…I’ll lay awake from now until then planning your entire Northwest holiday. You don’t want that….but you do need to hotel-it downtown…so I can take you to the Art Museum…and Museum Grounds coffee shop. Keep me posted…..she said smiling largely!

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  6. I think it’s time for a coffee and a huge slice of pie … my treat this time and hey did you see I am looking at an art class on Friday 🙂 we will see if I too can call myself an artist one day

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  7. I was going to say much the same as BTG and I will let his eloquence speak for both of us. I, too left that high paying miserable job for greener pastures although it took me a bit of time figure out exactly where those greener pastures lay (whilst sitting in pyjamas in the afternoon). Doors will always open for those with the vision and the energy to find them. And you have both, Jots as this blog post attests :).

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    1. You encourage me to give “permissions” in so many areas. Thought you should know that. I do listen to what you have to say. Thought you should know that, too. If I’m going to keep this PJs in the afternoon going….will have to find some smartly fashioned ones…with slippers to match? I could be the new and improved….Loretta Young…remember her….? All her clothes looked like PJs…..nevermind she said…laughing.

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      1. Loretta Young was clearly onto something :). You go, Jots. The permissions are within you, it’s just time to give them an airing. So glad you’re enjoying the series, it always amazes me how much commonality there is in the human condition.

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    1. There will never be enough hours in the day, days in week, months in…..you know, Mr. C. to do all the things we’d really really like to do. One day at a time, right now…seems to suit. If there is a secret or magic key to turning ones-self “off”….I’d love to hear what you have to say. Maybe a future post?

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    1. Thank you Kate. You’ll be where I am…fairly soon as I recall? I do believe it is different when you have a spouse or sig.otr. to share with…and from what you write…you and the Mr. have great plans!!

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  8. You are an artist right here on this blog. What a beautiful post in beautiful, clear, concise words. I felt every emotion. Best to you as you find the perfect fit once more, because you will.

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    1. I’ve decided my “new and improved” purpose is to teach myself how to watercolour! It was the only class I took as an under grad. that I received a C in. I was devastated!!! So….it may take a while…but at least I have a goal….works, don’t you think?

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  9. Oh my goodness, I had written this comment offering words of support and encouragement, and I lost it 🙂 I was about to close with this quote: to be irreplaceable, one must always be different by Coco Chanel… And I feel that you are both different and, thus, irreplaceable…I’ll just leave it at that because I don’t think I can remember the rest of what I had written 🙂 all the best and keep believing in all the possibilities that are out there for you, I know, I am also an artist that works almost for free just to be near knowledge and creativity…Alexandra

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    1. Alexandra….soul sisters we are!!!! I smiled at your comment that you are an artist that works “almost” for free…..but don’t we all…just to keep your heart’s pumping and creative juices flowing?
      Not a real creative metaphor…but you get the gist.

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      1. This is an honor! Much like we say DINERO LLAMA DINERO, that is money calls money…well,to me CREATIVITY FEEDS CREATIVITY… People don’t get that we can work in exchange for the opportunity to feel creative, or as we also say POR AMOR AL ARTE, just for the love of the art (anything you give your soul in doing is your art) most certainly, I agree with you, the important thing is to keep the creative juices flowing which I feel, in us “artists/creative types” those creative juices run in a 1 to 1 ratio with blood in our veins 🙂 read you soon

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  10. Jots, best wishes in finding the next opportunity. Life moves on and so shall you. There is a sense of freedom and purpose to figure out the “what’s next” in our journey. Take your time and find the most suitable path forward. I hope you enjoy it as much as the last. I left an organization that sapped the joy out of working and am now with one where I make less, but get do the fun parts of the job my old company made difficult to do. Take your time and find a job that matches your passion. Take care, BTG

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    1. I have to be honest here….I do look forward to your words. All of them. Any of them. We could be really cool neighbours and best friends….you know…trading jabs and gabs over the back garden fence? Yeah….that would be just soooo fine….

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  11. In my own life, I’ve found that the places that took time to get to were worth more, if only because of the struggle to get past what was.

    So since you had been volunteering, is there a museum or some other type of public art organization around? I bet they would be privileged and honored to have your services.

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    1. It’s the struggle to find what you’re looking for, El G., that makes the “finding” so sweet. You said that…I just said it again…in agreement. We have a great Portland Art Museum Crumpacker Library….filled to the brim with????? ART books. I’ve already looked into volunteering for the head librarian. She helped and helps me with on going research projects….which I’m still doing even though the gallery is moving. As always, nice to hear your voice.

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